i am neurotic.

When i see a shirt or article of clothing in my closet that i haven’t worn in a long time, i feel sad that it might be lonely, so ill put it on and walk around the house until i go out then i change back into what i wanted to wear.

I have a certain sweater, that is now particularly ugly and out of style. However, on the third wednesday of each month, I have to wear this sweater. It all started four years ago, and it was the third wednesday in January. I was wearing this particular ugly sweater and I had the best day of my life. The next couple months were miserable. Everything went wrong. I did everything I could do to make things better such as voodoo and tarot cards; i even tried the advice on fortune cookies. Finally, I decided to wear that ugly sweater on the third wednesday of the month. And ever since then, everything has been going better with me, except for the fact that every third wednesday of the month I am criticized by somebody about my ugly sweater.

Whenever I get changed in a public restroom, I hum the superman music to myself.  I try not to, but sure enough I still end up pretending i’m switching identities to a superhero.